Happy Monday

Those aren't words that usually come out of my mouth, but .. there they are. Yesterday I posted a 'bitch & blog', venting off some things that needed venting. You know what they say about women, if we don't bitch we'd blow up! The venting worked and I feel much better today. But I didn't want to leave the blog with a negative topper. So ...

Here are some things I'm happy about this morning:

*I was able to up my morning sit-ups by 5 per rep. ~ Not a huge achievement I know, but a small step. More importantly, an attainable step .. since I've obviously gotten there! I love this quote and it is something I repeat to myself when my goals don't seem lofty enough: The journey of a thousand miles begins with one step ~ Lao Tzu. ~ It may not be lofty, but it is a start. It is putting one foot in front of the other and slowly getting there.

*Speaking of steps and journeys, the kids and I are planning on walking to our playdate at Longwood Park today. ~ This is something that once was very easy for me to do, many years ago. Then, after the boys were born, the walk seemed many, many miles long, uphill both ways, and etc. It became very daunting. I haven't walked there in too many years. Oddly enough, now that we're stroller free & will be toting along any needed items in a backpack, now it seems do-able. Hopefully it will become a very regular walk for us. But, as with the one above, we'll start with one step. Sometimes Tristan sleeps late, not giving us enough time to walk, and sometimes there are errands that also need to be run. So, we'll see. It's a start though, and I'm happy about that.

*All the work we got done this weekend ~ This weekend was a wonderfully productive one. Lots of scraping, sanding, plastering, and painting inside. A new compost bin built outside (we have two now; one for filling the other for emptying), lined with chicken wire to keep nosy dogs' paws out. We cleaned out the chicken coop. We emptied out our pond and cleaned it. Hopefully this evening we will be getting a new filter for the pond. Sometimes you just have to start over. I also got several loads of laundry done and was able to hang the majority of it outside to dry. Is there anything so wonderful as laundry drying on the line?

*Family ~ I have a great husband and two fantastic kids. We also are blessed to have some truly wonderful family members in our lives. Thinking back to the 'bitch & blog' from yesterday, it is heart warming to know that my family still loves me. I can send my kids into fits of hysterical laughter simply by dancing around the kitchen, shaking my butt (actually, I am a dinosaur swinging my big tail from side to side), and making silly noises. There is a moment when you try to make your friends laugh via similar antics only to get looked at like you're a freak & you realize just how cool your kids are, how wonderful their sense of humor is. (And maybe that your butt is big, but at least they can laugh when you swing it around)

*Mother Nature ~ Suddenly, as I typed those words, that commercial where Mother Nature appears with your monthly gift popped into my head. That wasn't where I was going with this. There are so many days when I can feel overcome with self-pity. Where I sob on and on about everything that is going wrong and I don't feel taken care of. And, then, I am happy for Mother Nature. Spring that brings buds, blossoms and flowers to cheer us; birds singing, chickens laying more eggs. Summer with food growing everywhere, bringing to mind Porgy & Bess and how the livin' is easy. Fall's crisp air, a reprieve from Summer's heat. Winter's cold that forces us to take time to heal on the inside and huddle near loved ones. - I know some people would call this God's work. Call it whatever you'd like, we call it Mother Nature. But by any name, it is truly divine.

*You ~ You who take a few minutes out of your day to read this blog. I am grateful for you. Your comments and kind words mean so much to me. Even if we haven't met in any way other than online, you are so, so dear to me. You help make my day a little bit brighter. Thank you.

And, there you have it. Some things I am happy for this morning. There are many more things I could list (Jeff Bridge's acceptance speech last night for example), but I'll leave the list as it is. Thank you.

Seasonal Bitchin'

This time of year there is a lot of bitchin. In fact, I think it would stand to reason that there is more bitching about the Season ... or rather the Holidays, than there is actual celebration of the Holidays & Season. And, when that is the case, something just ain't right folks.



~Our "little" tree, all decorated & lit up. The golden glow around it is from the Leg Lamp in the other corner of the room~

Above is our "little" Christmas tree. We have really tall ceilings, and so tall, tall trees are a "must have." Financially this means we stick with white pines because they're cheaper. This year there seems to be a very limited supply of them, and tall they aren't. Ours is still 8' or so, but it just seems tiny in the front room. *waaahhhh* When we began decorating it, we realized this tree's branches were particularly thin and weak, meaning most ornaments are actually hung on the wire of the lights. We ended up only putting one box of ornaments on the tree. *waaaahh* GET OVER IT!!!!
Why do I need to get over it? One, this little tree turned out to be a blessing. This year our dogs are indoor dogs for the first time. More ornaments to attract nosy dogs is something we do NOT need. Also, really importantly, this was the first year we've let the kids help decorate the tree. Our kids are 5 1/2 and 3. We made it through the one box with only one broken ornament, and I think it was just that ornament's time, not so much a slip of hands. But, again, more ornaments were not needed. Decorating with the kids was wonderful, albeit a few "AACCK!! Don't touch THAT ornament!!!" moments since we have several ornaments that are glass and were blown by friends. Decorating the tree should be one of those positive family memories. Let's just stick with the one box before we end up killing each other, ok? Ahh .. happiness.



Pardon me for going all third person here, but Mama Taney is sick of this Seasonal Bitchin'. Really. There should be signs that say "Tis the Season to Bitch and Moan." And Mama Taney ain't havin' it no more!!!
We're ALL broke, ok?? Even million-ba-jillionaires, I'm sure, are complaining and whining because they don't have enough money right now to afford luxury, solid gold, diamond encrusted crappers for everyone on their list. It really doesn't matter how much money you have this time of year, because in your eyes, you don't have enough.And that isn't the fucking point!!! It isn't about money! It's about trying to survive having to be around all your relatives without going insane and starting WWIII. Just kidding. It's about trying to be grateful for those insane relatives because it means you're LOVED. That someone out there in this big blue world is thinking about you and loves you. And you love them. *pardon me while I get my tissue*


After the tree was decorated and the kids were in bed, there was a knock on the door. Due to recent issues with knocks on doors I was more ready to call the cops than curious as to whom might be calling. It was Boy Scouts collecting non-perishable, canned goods for the needy. I gave them organic green beans. Our cupboards might not be over-flowing, but they certainly aren't bare, and even people who can't afford to buy their food deserve to eat organic food.


And there is the other point of the season. To remember that you're warm and safe and the biggest thing you have to do is bitch about the credit card bills you've chosen to rack up to buy gifts. That you have a roof over your head and food in your cupboards. That you have shoes on your feet. That your children are safe and in their beds (or wherever yours may be), but that they're safe, and healthy, and that you're know that they are and you're not praying that they were alive with you this year, or that they can be moved out of the ICU, and so on.

~My kids, meeting Santa, in the snow. I know you've seen this before, but it still oozes of Christmas Spirit when I see it and makes me smile~

It is nearly impossible to not get wrapped up in the commercialization of it all, I know that. I've started throwing catalogs away without looking at them, deleting emails without looking at them. And it feels great .. a weight lifted off my shoulders. Pass the chex mix please!

If you can't get over it, then let me know. I want to make sure to stay the hell away from you this holiday season.

Thanksgiving & Gratitude

~This moment of gratitude is brought to you by David Della Rocco~

Do you watch cartoons? Have you ever seen that episode of American Dad where Roger has to be nice? You know, they tell him it wouldn't kill him to be nice and grateful, but it turns out that it will kill him. He has to bitch and vent to be healthy.
Ok, so I'm guessing by now you've figured out that this isn't the typical attitude of gratitude, ready for Thanksgiving post.
And, lest you think I'm wussing out already, I AM VERY grateful for the things I have. I am blessed to the stars and back, and I am grateful every day for those blessings.
But, maybe, just MAYBE, I ought to stay offline as much as possible this week. Every where I turn I see people posting/emailing/twittering/whatevering on and on and on about how grateful they are. They're grateful for their family. They're grateful for the weather. They're grateful for the shit they took this morning.
Like people in thong bikinis, they've revealed FAR too much!! Enough already!! We get it, you're happy!!
Perhaps I am a cynical and bitter person. But perhaps not.

So - in honor of this plethora of gratitude and thankfullness (that makes me only thankful for the bottle of booze in front of me) I will NOT post about our Thanksgiving. I will wish you all a happy one .. as I wish you every day a happy day.
Other than that I am going to show some fucking modesty and keep it between myself and my loved ones.
:)

Revelations

Sometimes I am hesitant about how personal I want to be on here. While I believe there are some things a family, or just a person, best ought to keep to themselves, I also believe we have utterly lost the knowledge of how to be a thriving a functioning community or village. Locally it rarely exists. Online it is beginning to come back.
October was a really rough month for us, as I am certain it was for most of the country given the current economic troubles. I will begin with I know how blessed we are for the things we have and we are TRULY grateful for them. But, you can be as grateful as you want and that doesn't make times any less tough sometimes. November is shaping up to be the same way, and I am sure with the holidays coming that December will be rough as well. We're luckier than many, and we know that, but it is still rough.
We are eagerly awaiting the results of the election tomorrow. No matter which way it goes it will be historic. We're VERY much supporting Obama & Biden and VERY, VERY much against McCain and Palin. We don't see ourselves as Democrats but more as independent thinkers who look at the pros and cons and make our choices from there, without looking at party tickets so much.
I keep seeing these commercials about Obama wanting to raise taxes and it bothers me since one of his core messages is lowering taxes for those who don't make a lot of money, and pretty much taking away tax cuts for those who do (so they would be back to where they were under Reagan). I see Obama saying what he wants to do and seemingly with a very detailed plan. I haven't seen that from McCain. I have gone to both of their respective websites to research their stances on subjects that matter to me, to hear it in their own words. And based upon that, we are very scared of what is going to happen should McCain get elected. We plan to make a stand should that occur, a definitive stand to continue with greater energy and dedication to they way we've been living our lives and trying to live.
So, what has my revelation of late been? It has been how I've watched the people who have the least to give be the most willing to give. Be the first to help out. We've been very blessed with help from my family in the last week.
The chickens have all recovered from the attack, and seem to have actually bonded nicely because of it (a silver lining) ~ but it was the help from my Mom and Step-Dad that allowed us to get the supplies to fix the tractor to try and help prevent another attack. We were blessed that someone was willing to "share" a deer with us this year; my mom, knowing we couldn't afford it right now gave it to me as a early birthday present. And today, my Dad has offered to give me another early birthday present to help afford the pork I have to pick up this afternoon. (Long story short: we ordered "extra" pork this year because we didn't get any deer last year, and so this year is turning out to be a wonderful example of Murphy's Law). The people we are picking up the pork from have agreed to let us pay what we can now and the rest by the end of the month. We will certainly never cease doing business with them. It is without their help and giudance that we would've even been able to make the leap for organic meat, and it is with their help and understanding that we're able to continue to do so.
My father also saved for us his bags of leaves from his maple tree. It was several VERY full 55 gallon bags. We've used them as bedding in the coop for the biddies and also to give the garden a nice covering. This helps let us put off getting some more straw until we can afford it a little easier. One man's burden is another's treasure at it's finest.
Justin and I have talked about the things I do: baking goods, canning things, and making soaps and shampoos, along with postcards & other things I do with my photography, and I've told him I would like to be set-up enough to be able to sell some of these things at the local Farmer's Market by next Spring. Hopefully that will help us out some as well.
People talk, well commercials talk, about what each candidate represents. I believe in Obama and his sincerity in wanting to help the middle class out. I believe in McCain's desire to keep helping those who really don't need it. Those are things I believe, but here are the things I know: that some of the kindest and most sincere people I've ever met have been members of the middle or lower-middle class. That those without great monetary worth have so much more worth and generosity within and about them. That the amount of money you make doesn't equate to the kindness in your heart. Of course there are exceptions, but in general, this is what I do know.
We, these people, DO work hard. And we appreciate the things we have even more so because of the difficulites it takes in getting them. Because of the physical labor it takes to produce something. Because we know how close we are, as well as those we care about and those like us are to being without and losing everything. I resent the notion that we (those who are liberal or who will vote Democratic, and so on) aren't hard workers. We are. We are the backbone of this country, and it is a strong backbone. And I am grateful for everyone who is part of that with us.

Getting over Ourselves

At first I felt the need to post a blog of apology for the negative context of my last two postings. It really isn't my normal style, though at times I feel a good "Soul-Screaming-Crying-Out-to-the-Cosmos" (and not the flowers!) is what is needed. But being negative only brings about more negativity, and that isn't good.
Yes, I feel like my neighbors need to get over themselves and their outrage that we choose to garden, have chickens, grow tall flowers, and not spray toxic weed-killer everywhere. But, I need to get over my indignity at them for their hiring a complete lawn-care team who attacks a barely 1/2 acre lot with 4 grown men and many loud obnoxious machines. That's their right, just as we have our rights. And most importantly should be the fact that we have the right to disagree without being disagreeable.
So, I'm left feeling the need to express some gratitude. Here are things I'm grateful for, in no particular order:
1) My wonderful kids who keep me on my toes at all times, but who already know about composting (who thought I would utter the phrase "NO, you CAN'T compost your cereal for the chickens, you need to eat it!!"), and who burst into tears if they find out the miss a trip to take the recycling.
2) My husband who allows me to be home with the kids, the dogs, the guinea pigs, the chickens, the fish, and who does a good job of keeping me grounded. If it weren't for him I would've already tried to concoct a complete rainwater harvesting system without giving it the true time and thought it desperately needs to make it work.
3) My chickens. The ones who we've bred for meat and who have provided us with a beyond-healthy meal that truly spoke to my soul. The ones who are beginning to lay eggs and delight us each day with a trip to the tractor. With our two new Ameraucanas who will lay blue and green eggs for us in the next month or so.
4) To Joel Salatin and Nina Planck for being sources of inspiration and information. For being the light in dark times, the encouragement needed to continue on when all odds seem against us. They don't know how much them mean to me, and they should.
5) To the folks who work with the City and who have to deal with small-minded complaints from sweet VL (and other neighbors?) who really ought to live somewhere where there is a nice, strict Homeowner's Association.
6) To Debby & Larry Bright who we get our pasture-raised, big "O" word meat from, who have been an endless source of patience and understanding. They helped us know how to fill out a butcher form and they've shown we're more than just a check to them, they're here for us in tough times.
7) To my family and friends who don't always understand me and our reasons, but who are willing to listen and maybe learn, and if not, at least politely humor me.
8) To my acupuncturist at Dancing Crane in Salem who has given me a life almost completely free of migraines. Who was the first to truly listen to my body and treat me according to that. To his wonderful father who always brings a smile to my face.
9) To the so many other wonderful bloggers online (Jenna Woginrich from Cold Antler Farm, the Dervaes Family in Pasadena) who inspire me to do more and try more.
10) To the wonderful vendors at the Salem Farmer's Market whose ranks I can't wait to join, and whose patience I always appreciate when I inquire about their growing methods. These are truly wonderful people.

I could continue this list, and in many ways I ought to. Life is wonderful. It is through hard times and hard lessons that we learn the true merit of a person. It is ok to get down in the dumps from time to time, but it is the ability to pick ourselves back up by the bootstraps, to take stock and look around and realize how blessed we truly are that matters most.
To quote Monty Python "Always Look on the Bright Side of Life" .....
Thank you all who help me remember that! I don't normally sign my blogs here, but truly, with complete understanding of the meaning of the term:
Namaste,
Carrie
(aka - Mama Taney)